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And You May Find Yourself

A Guided Practice To Never Fearing Death Again

If you found out you were going to die tomorrow, what would that information stir in you? Calmness? Regrets? Sadness? Need? Wishes? What promises would you make to yourself, if you could suspend the end? 

And what if the time from now until tomorrow is compromised by your condition? There would be no arranged farewells, no last meal of your choice, none of the luxuries that Hollywood or bucket lists suggest are available to us. 

For 5 days in an ICU in NYC this became my reality. Isolated, not allowed food or water, not coherent or comprehending enough to communicate with my loved ones, and too scared to go to sleep in case I didn’t wake. I use my love for music as the backdrop for my story. The songs and lyrics that elevated my spirit, mended my heart and showed me the real connections in my life. Songs that brought me comfort and that brought back memories of the people, places and times that mattered the most.

The key concept of the book is ‘practicing death’. Faced with a high possibility that this was the end for me, ‘Practicing death’ is the idea that you can use my story and my experiences over the last 5 years, to deal with the inevitability of death. Use this story to evaluate your life, to challenge yourself with the big questions, and to shape your life in such a way that WHEN that time comes, you are more in control and more satisfied with your answers than I was. 

Jennifer Nellany
Jennifer Nellany
A timely, important read
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Although clearly written pre-pandemic, the concept of “practicing death” is more timely than ever. Mr. Murphy describes his medical trauma in great detail - sometimes gory, sometimes amusing - and it helps take the reader directly to his mindset to see how he developed his thinking and healed himself - both body and mind. While one does not have to experience same health catastrophe, the impending fear that everyone has as a result of the coronavirus pandemic is a satisfactory equivalent for the reader to be able to adapt the learnings from this book to develop their own path towards living each day better than the past.
Heatherlee
Heatherlee
Live the life that matters most to you!
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And You May Find Yourself is well-written, timely, and inspirational. The details the author shares about his experience with his brush with death and how he discovered what was really important in life are vulnerable and candid. Wrapping his story around music is interesting to the story but also shows us how important music can be as a coping mechanism.
Tarana Mehta
Tarana Mehta
Memoir about life and how we choose to live it
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A beautifully written memoir about life and how we choose to live it. The author’s gripping tale about his unexpected brush with death and the profound effect it had on him and his journey as an entrepreneur, husband and father is truly inspiring. Read it if you are ready to answer some hard questions about the value of the decisions we make and the importance of time.
Rowland Hobbs
Rowland Hobbs
Poignant, amusing, and instructive journey
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Gerry spins a narrative around his near brush with death. Sounds heavy? It's not. He has a light touch, and the use of music throughout makes you connect more to his particular experience. With a wicked turn of phrase, Gerry pulls you into his poignant realization, but his writing is delicate enough to let the reader come to their own realization. It helped me tremendously focus on what matters, but with a sense of joy, hope, and banging soundtrack. Highly recommended read (and listen).
Thomas Rizzo
Thomas Rizzo
Living Music!
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I didn't just read this book, I HEARD it. No, not as an audiobook - but Gerry Murphy's unique style, plus his artistic and descriptive use of music, make for an unforgettable audible experience in your head. It goes quick, and every minute of it is a gripping page turner (well, sort of. I read it on kindle, but you know what i mean). I look forward to Gerry Murphy's next one - I just hope next time it has a little more Bon Jovi.
R. Robinson
R. Robinson
This book is a gift!
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Gerry has given us all the gift of a front row seat to his most personal and transformative life experience. His story is as captivating as it is inspirational. Don’t miss the chance to learn the hard earned lessons he shares freely.
Mike Ortiz
Mike Ortiz
Feeling grateful through music lyrics
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You can feel what Gerry feels with his choice of song and the dialog he uses throughout the book. His book is unique with each chapter starting with a different song. His story is inspiring and I recommend this book!
Callie Worthington
Callie Worthington
Emotional, Timely, and Thoughtful Storytelling
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I couldn't put this book down. Murphy is an incredible storyteller. Read it in one sitting and experienced every emotion you can imagine (there were definitely tears). I can't imagine a better time to read this book--I finished it feeling grateful for my life, my health, and my family--which is exactly what I needed to feel during these tumultuous times. Highly recommend.
Simina K. Cana
Simina K. Cana
Embrace everything, appreciate the progress, accept change and balance
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Great read hitting on many key topics we all need to better process, understand and accept. Don't wait for a big life moment to make you realize what you are missing or what really matters or what stresses you. Practice it every day! Appreciate the progress. Except the change. Learn from everything and everyone and always try to see things from the other side. Open yourself up emotionally - which seems very hard - but likely has many rewards behind the process.
Robbin Allen
Robbin Allen
A simply Fantastic and Necessary read
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Just wow. Funny, painful, thought provoking. Gerry Murphy’s writing style is absolutely delicious. And perhaps most importantly — he got me to THINK. And yes, I realized I’ve been putting off joy. But what if I run out of time? Thank you, Gerry, for sharing your journey and for putting me on one of my own.
Molly McPherson
Molly McPherson
A book with an amzing playlist
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A beautifully written memoir weaving the fragility of life with a soundtrack for how to live it. Reading the book about the author's brush with death and journey back from it made me wish I could have the author create a Spotify playlist for living a life while 'practicing death'. This is a book for people who love to reflect on their life with a soundtrack to help define it. A quick read that will leave you reflecting on your life's soundtack.
Stace
Stace
Must read
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I finished this gem in just a couple of hours. Very inspiring and insightful!
Becca
Becca
Start to Finish Gerry Takes You Through An Incredible Journey of Persistence.
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Wow, the journey Gerry takes you through of navigating a traumatic experience, finding value in self and endurance, and showcasing the importance of family and friends when life gives difficult situations is truly a must-read. It will make you question if you have the strength to endure and keep your head on straight, while realizing that life takes unexpected turns and you must just go with it best you can, as strong as you can.
Laura Cook
Laura Cook
Faith and Family are our strength!
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I had the pleasure of working under Gerry for a few years when he was working in St Louis. I heard that he had surgery but never really knew the extent of what that meant until now. It is hard to understand the amount of pain and fear that a person goes through when they don’t know the outcome of what’s to come. I met Francis and Caitlyn at a company dinner, maybe because I met them makes reading this a little harder. I can’t say I understand all the music quotes, but I know that they are important to Gerry because he’s a music guy. I read the book in just a few days; laughing, rooting for him and feeling bad for what I now understand he went through. The book is so relevant right now with COVID and people being unsure of their outcome if they end up in the hospital with the possibility of not making it out.
Kirsty
Kirsty
Thought provoking read
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The intimate detail of the author's near death experience and his thought provoking learnings from that make this a very interesting read! The practical tips, which everyone will no doubt relate to, are a healthy and powerful reminder that life is short but never too late to start living it to the fullest.
Jim
Jim
Come Walk with Me!
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How can you not react positively to this honest to goodness life story of someone who following a critical health experience is given the opportunity to revisit his CV- warts and all. A God given gift of hopefully seeing what you like in the mirror or if not cutting..
Lisa
Lisa
You have to get this book!
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The story is riveting - I kept tuning the pages to find out what happened- but the gentle way Gerry’s experience causes you to question your own path in life is what stuck me most. What would I promise myself I would never do again if I was facing death? And why do I need to go to that extreme to answer deeply those questions and change things in my life now? The way Gerry integrates his experience, his love of music and the deeper questions all of us should reflect on is human, vulnerable and so deeply perspective shifting. I’ll be thinking about this for days to come.
A J Brosser
A J Brosser
A whirlwind ride to death and back
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Gerry takes you on a whirlwind ride where he feels pain, despair, fear, guilt, helplessness, embarrassment, shame, luck, fortitude, friendship and love. Moreover, he shares the awakened realisation of what is truly important in his life from looking back on the past, how it is today and moreover how he can get a better balance in the inevitably precious days in front. It's certainly not cliche or over-sentimental. It is genuine and the thoughts of a man who has lived through near death for sure and taken the time to carefully reflect on it. His bare all raw honesty stand out and it feels like a gift to the reader to learn from. The writing grabs you and pulls you in as you live through this traumatic nightmare but you come away with this enlightened sense of positivism
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